Chapter 1, Book of Ballyhoo for year of our bike 2008:
1: Welcome back fans of old, and new apostles alike. The Wreckoning is upon us, and the carnies have been unleashed onto the vehicular world as we know it. 4 months until the carpocalypse (or the end of festival season for us) and between now and then we have much work to do. As each tour is launched, new tales, trials, and tribulations unfold, and if we are lucky a new city to boot. Before I proceed however, let us pour a tinge of malted adult refreshment onto the soil in the name of our brethren in Missoula and Flagstaffâ�¦wonderful towns full of wonderful bicyclesâ�¦we wonât be rolling their way this season after many years. We will continue to support their bike communities, although not with this travelling nut showâ�¦
2: In order to spread the gospel about the Bicycle, one of the greatest inventions of all time, we have found ourselves opening this season with a new addition to the list of stopsâ�¦a city deeply steeped in traffic issues and congestionâ�¦a city unable to keep up with the wear and tear of street caused by vehicular usage. This city being the windiest of them all and the 3rd largest in the nation, yes ladies and gentlemen, we are talking about Chicago. Talk about a crappy place to driveâ�¦but on helluva spot to ride a bike!
3: On this 21st day of the 6th month, We were blessed by many gathered in the name of acknowledging and celebrating the possibilities of the human power over horse power. In the heart of an expansive city whose size alone tests a ridersâ metal, 500 cyclists joined forces and took to the streets on our Cruise-ade. 1500 reveled in the sun and showers for all things pedal powered and good.
4: Over the course of 6 hours, we rode, we rejoiced, we imbibed, and we grew stronger. For all those rolling forth upon pedaled wings revivalated, and those new to the bike were indoctrinated...and you know it was good.
5: What have we done?!
â�¢ We raised money for West Town Bikes $11,878 to be exact. Ride on!
â�¢ We saved ourselves from dumpnation by diverting 82% of our trash from hell-fill with the help of the Illinios Recycling Associationâ�¦ so many people, so little trash. Ride on!
â�¢ We also committed as a city to reduce our car miles for bike miles by joining Team Wonderbike and pledging to ride 126,820 miles in the next year! thats a whole lotta pounds of CO2 not going in the air
â�¢ We got another car-free convert, Joe Marinaro who donated his 2001 Jeep Cherokee ride for a new Black Sheep commuter bike.
7: And for all of you who came properly attired and awesomely inspiredâ�¦ and you know who you areâ�¦ many thanks and much appreciation.
Time is on our sideâ�¦
Reverend C Ballyhoo, the Deacon of Freakinâ, Oscar the Gashole, our angels and demons, and of course the hardest working man in showbiz, TK.